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My hovercraft is full of eels

"I hear the voices, and I read the front page, and I know the speculation. But I'm the decider, and I decide what is best. And what's best is for Don Rumsfeld to remain as the secretary of defense."

How many things about this statement bother you? Here's my list:

1) I hear voices...
This one is just too easy and frankly cheap. And if there is anything I'm not, it's cheap. Okay, I won't be cheap this time.

2) I read the front page...
I suppose that it's better than way back when he said he never read the paper or watched the news. But since all of the articles are continued on pages three and four, don't you think he'd flip it open? Don't know about you, but I'd feel better...

3) ...I'm the decider...
This is something my five year-old might say, but only when she's using "baby talk". As of this instant, DubyaSpeak doesn't have this one, but they will. Oh yes, they will.

4) ...I decide what is best...
This really is the scariest thing anyone has ever said. Ever.

I need a drink.

You and me both.

(need a drink, that is)

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